Chapter Thirty-Three

  "From today on, you are the tenant entering my house. As the landlord, I have the right to set some rules. For example, the bath mat in the bathroom. Since I don't know if you have any strange diseases on your body, after the stupid fool changes the new bath mat, it must be used by me first. This is the rule of the bathroom. Next is the water dispenser. There's only one, and I couldn't let you die of thirst - I'm a kind-hearted hamster too. So please use it elegantly with your tongue tip to touch the rolling ball, and the water will come out. Don't stretch out like a ghost in front of the outlet, that would be disgusting. This is the rule of the water dispenser. Then there are toys: you can play with the seesaw, ventilation pipe, and slide, but I really like the swing on the third floor, so you're not allowed to use it. As an exchange, I'll give you the brand new exercise wheel that I haven't used yet. This is the rule of the toys. Finally, about food and sleep: we can share food, but all the melon seeds in the bowl must belong to me."

  "Eating too many melon seeds can cause lipoma."

  "Really? But I'm happy."

  “……”

  "Alright, alright! I'm sick of it! As an equivalent exchange, I'll give you all the vegetable circle. Can we just end this already?!"

  "You look like you're really struggling, but little do you know, your cheeks and those eyes sparkling with excitement and calculation have given you away."

  He subconsciously stretched out his paws to wipe his face, confirming that he was as handsome and cute as usual. He put down his paws and said with a straight face, "Fart!"

  “……”

  "Next is the last thing, about sleep. As I'm a mouse who values personal privacy, having one more roommate is already very difficult for me. So listen up, buddy - why am I starting to speak in a translator's tone too? Anyway, you'd better listen up, the upper floor of the wooden house belongs to me alone, because I have secrets."

  At this, the little black who was holding a vegetable ring and flipping through it with interest stretched out the vegetable ring and scratched the nose of the fat milk tea in front of him - this action similar to teasing made the tiger-backed bear-waisted mouse squatting there speaking happily shook its body, retreated three steps in a row, and the little black sneered and threw away the vegetable ring: "Oppose."

  "What! You dare to oppose me!!" Jin Ran glared with his eyes wide open, his fur standing on end, and even his sharp teeth bared - then after staring at Xiao Hei's calm black eyes for three seconds, he chose to turn around abruptly and slammed the acrylic cage wall, "The idiot who reads scripts! You look back and take a look! The new person you just brought back wants to ride over my head - is there no conscience, is there no heavenly justice!!!!!!"

  "Idiot."

  “……”

  "You sleep on the lower level, you're so fat, what if you crush the wooden house? Besides, the lower level is more spacious and suitable for you. If you sleep on the upper level, your fat will squeeze out from all sides through the ventilation holes, think about it, how unsightly that would be."

  "...He paused for three seconds, then turned around and continued to punch the wall, "Tian La, you who are reading the script, did you hear that? It actually said I'm fat——this stupid hamster actually said I'm fat, my agent doesn't even say I'm fat, what right does it have to say I'm fat? And it said I'd be squeezed out of the ventilation holes on all sides if I sleep in the upper layer, listen to this, is this something you'd say to someone of the same kind?! Ah!!!!!!!! Not like human talk!!!!!!!!!!"

  Jiang Chuan, sitting on the sofa, let out a sneeze and inexplicably touched his nose tip, flipping over a page of the German annotated script in his hand. He paused for a moment, seemingly having some sort of feeling, and turned his head to look at the hamster cage behind him - and immediately saw Ah Fei pressing its face against the wall of the cage with its wet and shiny pancake-like face. Behind it, Xiao Hei was quietly squatting there, staring intently at it.

  Jiang Chuan: “......”

  Jiang Chuan saw Ah Fei using his own body to knock against the wall.

  Jiang Chuan: "Ah, is it too exciting? Isn't there an idiom called 'overjoyed to the point of tears'? Ah Fei really loves crying."

  Jiang Chuan's voice was not high or low, but in the quiet living room, it just happened to reach the ears of the two hamsters. Xiao Hei sneered and Jing Yan was shocked by his own enthusiastic performance, which unexpectedly resulted in... extreme joy?

  Jiang Chuan, honestly, stop bothering, with such stupid observational skills, you can't be an actor... even if you become one, you won't be popular!

  Jian Ran was furious and turned around, his paws trampling on the flames of anger as he rushed up to the third floor. He stuffed all the wood shavings and cotton from the second floor wooden house into the first floor, then squeezed in himself. After making sure the bed was comfortable, he finally heard the sound of Xiao Hei slowly crawling upstairs outside - this hamster's movements were really agile, if Jian Ran hadn't been stuck to the wall at that moment, it would have almost been impossible for him to notice Xiao Hei's movement sounds. It was even silent when it climbed from the first floor to the second floor, only making a soft thud as its head hit something, and then everything returned to silence again.

  Xiao Hei didn't say a word, nor did he blame Jian Ran for taking away all the heating equipment.

  He remained silent for three seconds, then scratched his belly and suddenly began to think if he was being too unfriendly and selfish. What if Xiao Hei froze to death because he had moved all the cotton away? --- A certain someone who completely didn't realize that he would get into a fight with his owner again repeated his actions and thoughts from before. The more he thought about it, the more uneasy he felt in his heart, so after waiting for a while, he finally couldn't bear it anymore and wanted to make amends. He lifted his paw and knocked on the ceiling board above his head.

  "What's going on?" came Little Hei's calm voice.

  "I've got a bit too much cotton, it's making me hot." Jian Ran said, "You come down and take some of the cotton away for me, that's an order."

  "You're so fat, of course it's hot when your fat burns."

  “……”

  The hamster's eyes in the lower layer suddenly widened into an inverted triangle, staring at a dark-colored hamster that was hanging upside down from the bars and swinging directly into its own territory. Before it could even react, it was pounced on by Little Black and knocked onto the soft cotton balls... For a moment, the scene of waking up in the pet store's hamster cage seemed to be replayed... Ah, how long had it been since I last felt the warmth of this soft, fluffy body pressing against mine?

  See you later.

  "What are you doing?! Did I tell you to rush into my room?! Did I tell you to push me?! Where do you think your paws are going, you rascal! Get off me - one, two, three, don't pinch my butt ahh! I'm gonna kick you, you scoundrel!!"

  Chubby.

  In the midst of howling, Jing Yan suddenly heard Xiao Hei's voice at a distance of almost within arm's reach - to be honest, since he had become a hamster, Jing Yan felt that he also had a bit of aesthetic sense as a hamster, for example, from the perspective of a hamster, Xiao Hei was the kind who looked handsome, sounded good and had an overall wild and overbearing CEO demeanor...

  If it were human, this kind of person would make Jian Ran want to overpower and bully them, listening to their cries and struggles beneath him.

  Then he remained still, only stretching out his paws and weakly poking the small black thing that was pressing on his body: "Move."

  Jianran moved away - the lower level of the wooden house was indeed spacious, so spacious that even two hamsters sitting side by side wouldn't feel too crowded. Jianran got up from the ground, tidied up his hair, shook his butt, and turned his head to see Xiaohei squatting beside him staring at himself - in the dimly lit lower level of the wooden house, those shiny black green bean eyes seemed particularly bright... Jianran's buttocks tightened, he subconsciously took a step back: "What are you looking at me like that for?"

  Xiao Hei turned his face away, no longer looking at Jian Ran. He chuckled and said: "Fatty, you're like a mother hamster, making any slight noise can get you excited and chattering away."

  He listened carefully to what Xiao Hei was saying, and the content of his words made him subconsciously want to use cotton balls to suffocate it so that it couldn't spit out ivory from its hamster mouth again. However, after careful consideration, he discovered that there wasn't much aggressive tone in this guy's voice... At most, it was just mocking and teasing?

  For a moment, the atmosphere in the air was somewhat tense, solidified and ambiguous.

  Wait a bit longer.

  This is not right!!!!!! Why should I flirt with a black and shiny mouse (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻

  "Less nonsense," the old generation and this generation are all male rats, stuttering and saying, "Take your cotton flower, you can roll away."

  "Come on, let's get intimate, that human outside is still expecting us to give him a litter of cubs."

  “……”

  "If you didn't have that function, that is." Xiao Hei slowly added, while sizing up the milk tea that had itself stuck in a wooden house and couldn't move, "It's not like it can't be done."

  “…………………”

  Let's put aside for now who married whom and whose daughter-in-law she is, and also temporarily ignore the tone of disdain and reluctance. I've long known that hamsters, with their cute appearance, are actually one of the most evil creatures in the world - they eat their own kind, mother hamsters eat their young, are sex addicts, and all they think about is "sex" and "food".

  At this thought, he straightened his back (if he had one) and said: "Give up, I won't have any involvement with you because you're just a hamster."

  "Is that so," Xiao Hei replied expressionlessly, "that's truly regrettable."

  There is no hint of "regret" in his tone at all.

  Jian Ran stared blankly as Xiao Hei hugged a bundle of cotton, then with the same astonishing agility, he flipped back up to the second floor - until the sound of cotton being torn and arranged came from upstairs. By the time Jian Ran reacted, he found himself awkwardly approaching them, only to find that they had gone cold again.

  It's utterly humiliating.