Wednesday morning we were on our way to Hilversum. Lucas was nervous, I could tell by how hard he gripped the steering wheel. He cleared his throat occasionally and talked a lot. I let him be. This was his first big project.

  Upon arrival, we were welcomed by a friendly-looking blonde woman with brown eyes. She was taller than me and Lucas, which wasn't too hard; we weren't very tall either. She extended her hand. "Mr. De Witte." He nodded. "Mrs. De Raaf?" She nodded. "Call me Nicole." And this is your lead actress, she said, offering me her hand. "Sophia De Witte," I introduced myself. "De Witte too. Your sister?" she asked, and if you ask me, she asked that with light hope. Lucas smiled briefly. "No. This is my wife and my one true great love," he said, blushing slightly. "And of course the greatest talent I know," he added.

  "Don't mind him, he's a huge kiss-up," I said teasingly. She laughed briefly and led us in. She took us to a small meeting room. There were more people sitting there. We took the last empty chairs.

  Nicole sat across from us. "Alright then, let's begin. We've seen your pilot episode and are very impressed," she said. "Where do you want to go with Hannah?" she continued. Lucas explained his idea. That his first season would have 12 episodes and the pilot as bonus material.

  "12 is a bit much. But your story and your hook for a second season are reasonable. But your basic cast of fresh faces is, however charming and potentially big names who haven't been ruined yet, a bit weak. What if we make it a bit juicier. Famous guests. Every now and then someone walks in, causing fans of that person to watch, and then BAM addicted to your good story and charming new actors."

  I could see Lucas found that a bit scary. "I can never afford those people, can I?" he said. "Don't you worry about that, we're giving you nearly 100% freedom and a budget for your actors, your crew, film locations, cameras, and your guests. The only thing we ask is, before we agree, a pitch for an episode with a famous guest."

  Lucas looked a bit troubled. "I have a vision. I want to start slow so we get to know the characters and their complex lives. Only then more difficult," he said. "There's plenty of room for that," Nicole said. "How many episodes did you have in mind? And the structure of those episodes?"

  Lucas explained his plan. The first 4 of the 12 episodes to get to know the storyline and characters and then start doing more. Nicole nodded. "Excellent. Then the 6th episode, nicely in the middle, could be the first guest, right?" This gave me some hope.

  We negotiated for another 4 hours. But then we had a deal. We would get a budget of 400,000 euros. They would set up a small marketing campaign as soon as filming was done. And we had a year to make the series. But then Videoland would have exclusive streaming rights and the option to air it on one of their channels if well-received.

  Lucas wasn't entirely on board with famous guests. He would have preferred to do it just with us. But we were assured it would only help. He wasn't so sure. At home we were quickly on the couch. "How am I supposed to fit characters in now, phitje? And who then? Am I allowed to choose that myself?"

  I kissed his cheek. "Calm down. Let's go through your celebrities bucket list." I crawled into his arms. "Who have you always wanted to work with?" I asked him. "Johnny Depp. Kate Winslet, David Tennant, Billie Piper, Gillian Anderson," he began. "Dutch my pretty," I said laughing. "Oh, do you think I'm pretty?" he said teasingly. And his fingers sought a way to my buttons.

  "Behave!" I said teasingly, playfully pushing his hand away. Even though he turned me on a lot. "First who I would want to work with," I said. He sighed deeply. "Fine then," he said. "But then you'll be my reward later," he whispered in my ear. I laughed briefly. He was incorrigible.

  "Angela Schijf. Seems like the ideal rival for Linda. You know, that type they always talk about. She comes home, slams the door. James already calls out. 'Oh no, you're in for it Angela.'" I had to laugh at that. "A character they always mention but who only appears very occasionally." He nodded. "Yes then I think the first time in episode 12," he said.

  "Hmm Jetty Maturain and your Dinner lady Priya as temprementfull Surinamese sisters who pop in by now and then to gossip and complain about the neighborhood." I nodded again. "What about Gene Bervoets? As a one-time father-in-law?" I suggested. "Say Mrs. De Witte. My bucket list, right? Not your youthful crushes," he said teasingly. "And why not?" I said looking at him mischievously.

  "Because they'll find you way too cute. And then want to take you from me," he said. I kissed him. "That's a possibility," I said mischievously. "But I only have eyes for one person." We named more famous names back and forth for another hour. Famke Jansen came up. Victor Reinier. Joep Sertons. Ria Eimers. In short. We had enough people we could see filling ten seasons or so. "Now huh Sophiatje," Lucas began who found my buttons again. "Can I have my reward." I giggled briefly and let him.

  The next day the mild stress began. We had half a year to finish writing the season and then another small half year to film it. Preferably faster if possible. Not that we were going in cold. Lucas had most of it already written. It was now about fitting in guest actors. Which had to happen.

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  The set we had used for the pilot was no problem for Videoland. So it was a matter of discussing that again. "That's why I find going big less fun Phi," he said after a few days. "Then it becomes just a job," he said. "It'll be fine. Once it gets going it'll be as fun as ever," I said running my hand through his hair.

  I wanted to ask for vacation from my job. But Lucas didn't want that. "Then we'll be on top of each other. That won't do us any good," he said. And just sent me to work.

  There the news quickly spread through the hallways that I was cast in a professional series. With the usual distortions of course. "Who are you all working with then?" asked Lana. A Ukrainian refugee girl about 11 years old.

  "Yesss," Jasmien shouted. "I heard Angela Schijf." I had to laugh. We had shared the ideas with Sam, Jonas and Joyce. And since Jasmien was Sam's niece she heard too much sometimes.

  "Does she have the lead role?" asked Stan. He was used to working with bigger names. He had performed in a play with Soy Kroon and Babette van Veen. "No," I said. "I have the lead role. I'm playing Hannah." This elicited a collective 'OOOOOOH'. "Who's the director then?" asked Luana. The daughter of one of my friends.

  "Lucas. My husband," I explained. "That's cheating miss," said Jasmien. "Totally!" shouted Sophie. "You sleep with the director. Of course you get the best role." Sophie was a sweet blabbermouth. A huge sweetheart she was just 15. So full-on puberty.

  "Now come on Sophie!" I said laughing. "He asked me if I wanted to play Hannah," I said. "Shall we just get back to the lesson now?" I asked. My whole class shook their heads. "No," said Stan. "Tell us what it's about?" I sighed. Real teaching wasn't happening today.

  At home I told him what happened in my class. Lucas had to laugh at that. "I'd like Sophie in my series too. What a rascal," he said. "Oh yes fun as little sister for Hannah." His eyes darkened briefly. "Probably not allowed. Probably needs a kid who does series more often." I took his hand. "You got almost free rein you know. They got your celebrities list and they'll handle that part you can fill in the rest yourself."

  He sighed. "I don't know if we did the right thing here," he said. "You wanted this Lucas," I said. He nodded. "I thought so. But now with celebrities added. With you guys I knew what you are all worth. Now i dont ." I smiled at him. "It'll all be fine honey. Most of it is just us. We film with the guests a few days. And then you only have shots with us," I said.

  His eyes lit up again. "You're right," he said and kissed my hand. "If I didn't have you," he said "then you'd have to find another Hannah. The kids liked Angela Schijf," I teased. "oh no never" he said kissing my cheek. "You're my Hannah."

  After a week we had commitments from both Jetty Maturain and Angela Schijf. Angela had no problem doing the low budget but it couldn't conflict with her schedule in Maastricht. Jetty thought it was a great idea. Playing gossip sisters with an unknown.

  We also pitched the idea of Sophie as Hannah's little sister to Videoland. They weren't very enthusiastic. They preferred famous kids. From the TikTok culture. "We can sell that more," Nicole had said. But true to her word she let Lucas make the decision.

  "Such a TikTok kid might be better for publicity but they often think they're so great. I want to keep Eve pure like Hannah," he said. "And Sophie is still so pure. She appears occasionally. Gets real TV experience. And you can support her. I say Sophie," he said "and she matches you a bit. You have red curls she brown." He nodded. "Yes she becomes my Eve," he said in a tone that suggested he had just decided it.

  After a week we had the appointment with the fertility doctor. It was a friendly-looking man with gray hair green eyes and a round face. "Sit down," the man said pointing to 2 chairs. "I've pulled your file. As far as I can see you're young and healthy. Why have you come to me?" he asked.

  "We've been trying to get pregnant for a year," I said looking at the ground. "But it's not working. We just want to know if I should just give up," I said still looking at the ground. "And why just you?" the doctor asked.

  "It's always the woman who can't, right," I replied. "Oh absolutely not. Sometimes it's the man who's infertile sometimes the couple's combination. No it's definitely not always the woman," he said placing his hand on my shoulder.

  "But tell me. Do you have a schedule?" Lucas shook his head. "No. I didn't want this to cause stress but now it's tearing her apart," he said. The man typed something into his computer. "Okay what contraception did you use before actually trying?" he asked.

  "I got the depo shot. Found it convenient. No period. No worries about forgetting it," I explained. The man's smile widened. "When was your last injection?" he asked. "Almost a year ago now." He nodded. "And how long have you had your period again?" I shrugged. "About 6 months now I think." The man laughed softly.

  "You know what it is with that. That shot lingers a long time. I wouldn't worry until it's been a year and a half and still no luck," he said. "I'll support you. You'll get a list of tips. A schedule to follow. But for now I see no reason for real tests. I propose a wait-and-see approach. From my side that is," the man joked.

  "So we still have every chance?" The doctor nodded. "Absolutely Mr. De Witte. At least if your intimate contact is as healthy as I think," said the doctor. Lucas and I must have blushed enormously because the doctor laughed heartily. "Healthy love filled marriage then," he said "Well the schedule's coming your way. Do with it what you want. There are also some do's and don'ts on it," he said. "The biggest do is... well I think you get that one," he said laughing.

  Hand in hand we walked outside. "See," said Lucas. "See what?" I asked. "Everything will probably be fine." He kissed me. "Yes but now schedules it becomes what you were so afraid of," I said. "No way. We'll look at the tips and see what the schedule says. And we can decide what to do with it," he said.

  "Who knows the schedule says for now Make love every night," he teased. "I could get into that." I gave him a playful tap and laughed. "Keep dreaming," I teased back. Together we walked to the car and drove home. The next day filming would begin.