I woke up in a bedroom with dark curtains, the kind made to drown out sunlight, though the edges of light burst into a thin halo around each of the two windows. The room itself was sparse, with only a desk and a chipped dresser on well-worn hardwood floors. A candle smelling of flowers was lit on the desk.

  My shoulder was back in place, and the arm that lay across my bare chest was splinted. I could feel the ache of bruising on that side of my body, but nothing hurt quite so badly as my head. I reached my right hand up carefully. The blood that had been caked on my forehead and face was gone, meaning someone had taken the time to clean me up in addition to setting the splint.

  Leaning to the edge of the bed, I pulled one of the curtains aside and was blinded by the bright rays flooding in. Through the sunlight, I saw the familiar sight of West Broadway.

  “You’re awake,” came the voice I had last heard in my Ford Ranger, hours before. Lanie strolled into what was likely her room, or more likely, a guest room in her apartment. She wore a navy blue bathrobe that ended at mid-calf, and her short, dark hair stuck out in all directions.

  “Wow,” I said.

  “What?”

  I motioned to my own messy mop of hair. “Your hair is…impressive.”

  “Thanks, I think,” she said, raising an eyebrow.

  “How did you get me here last night?” I asked.

  “I drove you, Maximus.”

  I smiled and gently moved my arms and legs. Every part of my body ached. “I love it when you full name me.”

  “Don’t try to butter me up. I’m the one who should be asking questions.” I froze, recognizing she hadn’t returned my smile. Her tone was cold.

  “Ask away,” I replied, realizing my pants were on top of the dresser, on the other side of the room.

  “Okay. How about we start with why I found you two blocks from my apartment, nearly dead in your car?”

  “That’s a two-part question,” I said. “Which part do you want me to answer first?”

  Lanie picked up a dark spherical object on her desk and threw it at me. The magic eight-ball beaned me in the forehead before dropping onto the bed next to me, and I felt an excruciating throb rocket through my brain.

  “Ouch!” I yelled. “What the fuck, Lanie?”

  She scowled. “Don’t get cheeky with me, Maximus. Answer the question.”

  I instinctively lurched from the bed, realizing too late my mistake. We looked at each other for a long few seconds. “I’m naked, aren't I?” I finally asked, recalling the line from the most underrated Mike Myers movie. My junk was most definitely flapping in the wind, and I felt my face get hot.

  Her mouth twitched as she fought a smile. I smiled back bashfully and made my way over to the pants on the dresser. “Any idea where my underwear went?”

  “In the wash,” she said, her smile having disappeared. “Now answer the question.”

  “The answer to both of your questions is Axel.” She looked confused, but also began eyeing the table. I was guessing for something else to throw.

  I grabbed the jeans, frantically trying to shove my first leg in. It got stuck halfway out of the foot. Shit. These weren’t my jeans.

  “What ARE you doing?” She asked, her arm paused mid wind-up. This time, she clutched the glass candle. That one would have hurt if she actually threw it.

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  I turned and hopped myself around to face her, one hand curled over my package. The jeans were still attached to my left foot. “This is just awkward. Let me guess, my jeans are also…”

  “In the wash,” she replied, finishing my thought. She lowered the candle, her robe gaping open in the front. I couldn’t help but notice that she, too, had very little on. My eyes traveled over her body. The robe had opened all the way down to her navel, giving me a teasing view of the curve of her breasts and stomach, what I’d always thought of as the most spectacular part of a woman’s body. My hands fell loosely at my side, my face growing even warmer as I stared.

  “Max, for God’s sake!” Lanie exclaimed, noticing my stare. She quickly pulled the edges of her robe together. “Cover that thing up.”

  It was my turn to look down, where I immediately saw the problem. It was like middle school all over again, except this time, my erection was on full display. I quickly threw my hand back up to cover myself and turned slightly to the side. “Er. Sorry about that. Do you, maybe, have a towel or another robe that I could borrow?”

  Lanie shook her head and walked over to a small closet that I hadn’t noticed yet. She tossed a towel to me, and I wrapped it around myself as best I could, given the splint on my left arm. My brain felt muddled, whether from the concussion or from the near-naked glimpse of the woman I’d been dreaming about since the moment I’d met her. What had she asked me again? Oh, right.

  “Okay, look,” I began. “I was on a job, and after the fare, another shade popped out of the grill.”

  “Shade?” She asked, a strange look on her face.

  “I have so much to tell you. While I was in Maine, I met another Dispatcher. He tried to explain the Bureau to me. He told me about the three departments and the Fates who oversee them, and that the Fines are really shades from a place called Terminus, where the Bureau's headquarters are located.”

  “Did he now?” The look on her face was a cross between disbelief and annoyance, and I realized that I hadn’t actually answered her question yet. “What was this Dispatcher’s name?”

  I paused. I knew telling her wouldn’t exactly make my story more plausible. I sighed. “Richard Simmons.”

  “Richard Simmons,” she repeated, grinning.

  “Look, I know how this sounds, but he gave me a lot of really useful information.”

  “Is he the reason you went offline for a while?”

  I nodded. “Apparently, an electromagnetic field can disrupt the watchful eye fourth_wall has over us.”

  “Max,” she began, crossing her arms over her chest. “You’re crazy, you know that, right?”

  “What?”

  “If Dispatch finds out you’re trying to avoid her, you’re in for some real shit.”

  “I know. I’m not going to make a habit of it or anything. Can I continue?”

  Lanie nodded and began rummaging in the closet again. “Turn around, will you? I’m going to change. Keep talking.”

  I turned and heard the soft sound of the robe sliding to the floor. I felt my heartbeat speed up, but forced myself to keep talking. “So this shade that came out of my car went straight toward the downtown area. I tried to follow it, but I lost it around South Station. And guess who I saw down there?”

  I started to turn back around as I spoke, forgetting why I had faced away in the first place. Lanie stood, clad in only a pair of tiny black panties that highlighted what had to be the most incredible ass I’d ever seen. I swallowed hard as she turned to reach for a bra, her sudden shift in movement giving me a good look at the–yep, spectacular–breasts that had only been hinted at in the robe. I stifled a gasp, feeling my heart skip a beat.

  “I’m guessing Axel?” Lanie responded, answering the question I’d forgotten I’d asked. I quickly turned back around.

  “Correct. I followed him to your apartment.” I paused, thinking about what to say next. “Axel took offense, I guess, and that’s how I ended up here.”

  “So that’s how you ended up unconscious?” she asked, her voice sounding much closer. I felt a hand turn me around. I was disappointed to see that she was fully dressed.

  I nodded. “Lanie, are you and Axel…”

  “No,” she said, before I could finish. She shrugged. “But we were.” My heart sank. She must have read my expression, because she shot me a fiery look. “That’s in the past, though. In the now, my coworkers seem to be acting like a couple of horny, possessive animals.”

  I had no idea what to say to that. She wasn’t wrong, I realized. Sure, I hadn’t been the one to attack Axel, but I had been following him like a jealous teenager mad that someone was trying to horn in on his girl. I cleared my throat. “If it’s over between you two…”

  “Don’t, Max. Don’t even finish that thought,” she said, cutting me off. “I’ll get you your clothes, and then I think you should leave. I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.”

  She stomped out of the room, leaving me standing there in my towel, her jeans still wrapped around my foot. My raging hard-on had shriveled away, leaving me with a gut punch more painful than anything I had sustained the previous evening.

  Lanie had made herself clear. There would be no relationship between us.

  - - -

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